New ground

Oh so much has happened since I was able to blog last... I've have NO time to. And when I DO have free time, I spend it with the other kiddies... Sorry folks. Liam has been rocking life. He amazes every one with everything he does. He has all the nurses wrapped around his cute chubby little finger. On April 15th Liam was transported to Primary's Nicu to have a reservoir put in. For you guys that don't know exactly what that is let me explain... a reservoir is kinda like a little button at the side of h is head. there is a little tube that goes into his ventricles and is connected to this little round dime sized circle that sits just under his skin. So it looks like he has a goose egg and a 1" incision.

every day they "tap" the reservoir. How they do this, is by poking his head with a small needle right in the reservoir and drain out spinal fluid that builds up in the reservoir. This should help clean out his ventricles and help things get draining. If his drainage system doesn't start doing its job, they'll have to put in a shunt. now a shunt is something that's permanent unlike the reservoir that comes out in a couple years. the Shunts starts out just like the reservoir in his head, but instead of having to go in daily with a needle, there's a tube that goes from his head, down his neck and chest, and into his belly. That's where the spinal fluid will go and drain into his blood system. Shunts are tricky though. they often have issues and need revisions within the first couple of years. So we were given the choice and we chose the reservoir first. Although only about 30% of kids that get these don't go on to need a shunt, we wanted to give him the chance to avoid the shunt. So we pray we are in that 30%. He's been doing great. and I mean GREAT. Very alert now, taking more feedings by mouth and finishing some. The pressure in his head however, makes him tired and sometimes he just doesn't have the energy to finish the feeds. So we will keep working on that. It looks like we may be up at primary's for a few more weeks. Which I dread. it's SUCH a long drive and the other kids are starting to feel mom being gone more... I HATE IT. I want to be with all my babies. We have been blessed with such amazing friends and family who have prayed, and helped us out SO MUCH. It has not been forgotten and we are still SO GRATEFUL for all the help and love we have been given. All the tender mercies that Heavenly Father shows us daily are a reassurance that he is still looking out for us and is happy with our knees hitting the floor so much. friends, He listens. He cares. and He loves us. Don't forget that. even in times of hardship where we are left wondering WHY?! He knows. So have faith that he will carry you through and keep him in your corner. He will help you finish the fight and make you stronger after it. The kids FINALLY got to hold and meet Liam. My mom heart was SO full to be able to have all my babies under one roof. The kids LOVED seeing him and being with him. Noah specially has had a special connection with Liam. Ever since I told him I was pregnant, he has always been very interested in him. asking me about him every day. When Noah came up to Liam's bedside last Sunday Liam's eyes were WIDE open and looking straight at Noah. He was moving around like crazy and his heart rate shot up. He KNEW exactly who Noah was. that special connection was so alive at that very moment. those two little spirits knew each other before this life. I am SO excited to watch them grow up together. Noah will be Liam's protector for life. Owen didn't know what to think of the whole situation but was still a great sport and held him and kissed him. Sophie was an adorable big sister and kissed him lots and told him how stinking cute he was.

This little chubs is almost 6lbs!!!

An Old Soul

Every day I wake up, make my husband his lunch, pump, get kids fed, changed and off to school, pump again, get ready to go to the hospital, arrive at the hospital and pump again, and then I reach my destination. Liam's bedside. I softly call out his name and he wakes up. He looks at me and every worry in the world is washed away. Not just two little eyes looking back at me. But two big windows to an amazing old soul. I've been told by nurses who have him for the first time, that they look at him and see SO much depth. they see an old soul. He knows what he's doing, and how to get the job done. He knows exactly why he's here, and his mission. All the worries about him go away as soon as he looks at me with those big eyes and I just feel joy. to the be mom of this amazing little spirit. How did we get so lucky to have him? My testimony and faith in God is strengthened every single day because of him. He is blowing everyone at the NICU away with his improvements. Liam is weighing in at just over 4lbs. (he was born at 2lbs 11 oz) he has started to latch on and drink small amounts of milk from me. which is GREAT since he's not supposed to know how to suck, swallow and breathe yet. OH what a joy it is to see him do this at 33 weeks when they don't usually start trying until 34ish. He is a CHAMP at it. His head size is staying stable so he gets to stay down in provo unless things change. but we only see them changing for the better. He was put back on a cannula yesterday because he is focusing all of his energy on learning to eat and wearing himself out. They tell me it's totally common and normal. as he grows he'll get the strength to keep his numbers up and be off of it. No biggie they say. He was moved to a crib!! no more incubator for him. It's getting hard to leave him every day. when He sits there and stares at you and holds your hand. just a few more weeks. just a little longer... Last week they came and took a few pictures of Liam and I to put on the new Utah milk bank website and brochures. Word got out that I'm a milk cow (really I am.... 70oz a day worth...) and that Liam was cute as a button and they came and paid us a visit. excited to see where they put us :)